I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Brandon just fucked that chick! I tried to warn him but T9 said she had "puppy roses" instead of "pussy sores"
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
After tacos, we're chasing women.
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
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