Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
He drives a PT Cruiser.... that should have been my first clue.
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
Randomize
