She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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