Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
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