I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
I woke up with glitter and eggshells in my bed wtf
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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