I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
How do 1 in 4 women misread a pregnancy test; how stupid are women?
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
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