Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
i promise the blood crusted on your tits is from him motorboating you after he tripped into the pool stick. nothing else.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Can't talk, ducks in the car
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
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