brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
It's an acquired taste. Like keystone. Or caviar.
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
