nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I need to shower, but I have no shower curtain... I think I can get by with a whore bath and a hat for one more day.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Randomize
