their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize