she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize