I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I had ketchup on my elbow and a random girl goes "I got it" and licked it off, only on game day
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
somehow I feel like "adventures with cocaine and molly" wouldn't be an appropriate "How I Spent My Spring Break" essay topic.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
