Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
Randomize
