Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
Randomize