if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
maybe next time you'll take an ex boyfriend warning you that she's batshit crazy as a warning instead of a challenge
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
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