Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I'm sorry I put my balls through your watch. On another note your roommate had them on his shoulder too sry
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
