You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Randomize
