How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
You smell like stripper and shame
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
be right there i have to get my cape
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
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