Midget sex pt 2 tonight
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
oh my god im such an asshole. i just asked the guitarist of bad religion if he was a scalper.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
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