i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
It would have been nice to break the dry spell with nice, civilized, sober sex somewhere other than on my friend's couch.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
sweet Jesus, who thought 13 martinis was a good idea? 11 was probably sufficient.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I just lived through a real life episode of jersey shore.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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