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Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
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