OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
You told him your wedding ring was part of your costume. not okay!!
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
Even my vagina gasped.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
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