I think i peed on brittanys purse
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
my comprehension of H.D. Thoreau really dives after 8 beers.....
It will astound me if they ever let you graduate.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I've realized that my life is a cycle of high that is only broken by sobering up at work, which only happens because I can't smoke more
Randomize
