yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
I trust that you have thought of something completely illegal for us to do this weekend.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
He said he wanted to start giving out "sex souvenirs". I got a poster with a penguin on it.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
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