Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
WTF I can't even get a boyfriend here and you're getting nudes from across the country
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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