I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Well I tried to call you. I was convinced my body was made of wood. But the Xmas lights in my room helped
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
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