I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i really need to stop putting makeup on my cats..
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
She asked what it would take for you to fuck her. You drunkenly mumbled, "pepperoni pizza" and then got in the cab by yourself. You were smiling too. It was weird.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
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