STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Randomize
