My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
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