My secretary told me she wishes she can have an affair with someone in the office (she's separated from her cheating husband)...Umm...Okaaay
these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Randomize
