I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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