y did u give ur computer a hand job?
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I'm an EMT, not a miracle worker. No, I can't fix your sprained dick.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
