before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize