the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Yeah. I realized I have a weakness for drugs and I need to move somewhere where I don't know how to find them.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
There was already gay porn open on my laptop with a tiny carrot cake, a bottle of water, and a note saying "I love you, Sober Me."
Drunk me just hits it and quits it.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize
