Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
I think there's an ice cream truck out back, but there's no way I can get pants on in time to catch it
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Randomize
