We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
I don't want my vagina anymore.
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