just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
I can feel you judging me through the phone.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
honestly dont worry about it, its not the first time ive injured myself on a potted cactus during sexual relations with a woman
After this weekend, all I can think about is bald eagles flying in front of fireworks and giving birth to fucking uncle sam. Also, beer.
Randomize
