TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
Randomize
