Ambien does the same to me. One time that I took it, I got this huge bowl of spaghetti out of the fridge and thought it was a castle and that the meatballs were little slaves. I ate all of them first and then the noodles were the soldiers and the sauce was the water in the moat. And when I finished, I fell up the stairs and threw it all up.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
I just typed 14 shots of Smirnoff into my calorie count toolbar. Then typed pole dancing 1.5hrs into the calorie burner search. Should break even.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Anyways, he came over at 3:30 am and ate me out while I ate pizza on the counter
It's not vacation until I get called "disgustinly sexy" by an fat woman whose older than my mother.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
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