Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
Just threw up in my seat during the national anthem. Probably not good.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Ugh why can't people just be grateful for my penis
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
