with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
His penis is literally smaller than my cell phone. I can't go out like that.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
I think I just sharted jello shots
Randomize
