Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I CALLED IT A FRIENDSHIP. NOT A I WANT YOUR MAN PARTS IN MY LADY PARTS-SHIP.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
when the cops came she just started yelling at them "Fuck the police! freedom of speech bitches!"
Randomize
