ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Vodka + horseback riding = vomit in the saddle bags
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
This couple is walking their pig around campus
OMG OMG OMG Ive hit the penis jackpot
It seriously took everything in my power not to sleep with him
What did it come out and serenade you? Lol
It sang to me in the dark. It was magical
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
