Christians are straight up FREAKS
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
