you ended the night by relentlessly sucking on my hips bone and hand demanding milk. you said it was because you were a tiger
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Im pretty sure my housekeeper high fived her on the way out this morning
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
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