belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Sorry your girlfriend got you a valentines present and you forgot to get her one.
How long will your dick be dry?
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
