You did not just play the dead husband card again.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I wish I could attach your penis to someone I like more than you.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
Well he has a girlfriend. So I told him that I wanted to have sex way more than I wanted to be a decent human being.
i'm behind the bar giving him a hand job. i need stuff to make my foot stop itching.
okay, this is where i needed to clarify that i was kidding before when i said that jizz helps mosquito bites. but let me know how that goes. for future reference.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
...there was a woman in the stall next to me in the Walmart bathroom having a massive bowl movement and whispering "I'm sorry" over and over
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
