Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
The gym is handing out free condoms this week, motivation to work out this week?
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
Randomize