Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
