Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
just threw up nine times in the shower.. solid night last night.
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Believe me honey Imma fuck the discount out of at least one plastic surgeon in my life
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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